Attitude Adjustment
Now I met an old friend
In the bar the other night
And he got a little drunk
And he wanted to fight
And he jumped up
And challenged every man in the room
And just about the time he got the words out
An 'ol boy jumped up and closed his mouth
And used his head for a mop
And his butt for a broom
It was an attitude adjustment
I guess it was his first time
An attitude adjustment
Now he understands just fine
He got bent out of shape
And he opened his mouth
And just one appointment
Straightened him right out
It was an attitude adjustment
Oh It'll work every time
Well I've got this big 'ol brother-in-law
And me and him just never did get along
Because he wants to make sure
I'm treating his sister right
He got drunk one night
And started beating me up
And I went and got a tire tool
Out of my truck
And laid him out as cold as a block of ice
It was an attitude adjustment
And it will work every time
An attitude adjustment
I made him see the light
And he says I'm his kind of man
And he comes around with his hat in his hand
It was an attitude adjustment
I cured all his family pride
Now my girlfriend slapped me in the face
I said darlin' that was you're first mistake
Then she went wild and her eyes turned red
She started breaking everything
And screaming loud
And kickin' me and cussin' me out
And I gave her a little adjustment
On the top of the head
It was an attitude adjustment
Now she loves on me all the time
Just an attitude adjustment
She got a whole new frame of mind
She don't nag
And I don't beg
And we get along and like I said
Just an attitude adjustment
Oh everything's just fine
Well almost
She called the cops to take me in
And I said you're never gonna do it friend
And they just smiled
And said "Oh Yes We Will"
Now a stick to the head
And some kicks in the chin
And a several bites from Rin Tin Tin
And I couldn't wait to get into that jail
It was an attitude adjustment
Oh I went along peacefully
Attitude adjustment
Oh they made me clearly see
Cause my head is black
And my legs are blue
And both knee caps are bent clean through
It was an attitude adjustment
It made my whole outlook brand new
Just a attitude adjustment
It made my whole outlook brand new